no pictures, but i am thinking of them

i have stumbled upon an idea. i am taking this opportunity to place it outside of my head.

i want to start a series of photographs. i want them to be about our shadow sides, or rather my own. Carl Jung said that the shadow is the seat of creativity, it can be filled with layers and often overwhelms a person's actions when paralyzed by indecison, for example.

i know so well that no matter how hard i try to make art that is about something, it will never be about anything unless i reach beyond my surface level. this was proven to me in hind sight when i think of making art in school...it never felt like i was doing anything more than scratching the surface of something much more meaningful. i think i was often times paralyzed by the thought of what i was doing rather than just doing and being.

thus far i have been reading about the shadow side from a psychological viewpoint. as i read i am instantly transported to a personal example of my own-making me more curious about the mere definition of the shadow and how that relates to not only my own idiosyncratic bullshit, but others as well-essentially beneath that lies the collective unconscious or the universal truth that is human existence.

'they' refer to the shadow as psycho-dynamic repression or the disowned self. since i have spent years disowning my self and now am simply trying to understand and nurture it, i thought-what a better way to deepen my understanding than make art about it. something i feel i have been waiting for, that could come from this exploration is authenticity. as a result i have avoided making anything other than fun crafts and accessories. this enables me to make and be free from meaning, yet it still satisfies my creative fire.

as i absorb these thoughts and integrate them with my personal experience, i simultaneously working on a visual language that will bring in my personal style, color pallet, and vision to photographic work. i am thinking photography has everything i need to pull this off since i will spend more time building the idea and then the set can be reworked a number of ways without the limitations of painting. *sigh* i do love to paint. but...as the photographer cindy sherman came to realize while studying art- painting has its limitations and photography can set you free from them.

blabity blab blab. i am done now. thanks for tuning in-or out as the case may be.
sharing with you may just assist me in reaching my goal little blog. -x